


Reverie

by izayami



Category: Stray Kids (Band)
Genre: Angst, Car Accidents, F/M, Flashbacks, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Hurt/Comfort, Kim Seungmin is Whipped, Kim Seungmin-centric, Mentioned Stray Kids Ensemble, Neverending Story by Stray Kids, Reader-Insert, Songfic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-20
Updated: 2020-05-20
Packaged: 2021-03-03 03:34:58
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 2
Words: 5,032
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24288229
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/izayami/pseuds/izayami
Summary: In which the love between you and Kim Seungmin is neverending.
Relationships: Kim Seungmin/Reader
Comments: 2
Kudos: 10





	1. Reverie: A Neverending Story

From the backstage, Kim Seungmin could hear the screams of the excited fans who were waiting for their stage. Closing his eyes as he leans against the wall, he heaves out a deep breath.

'Calm down Seungmin,' he thinks as he tries to ward off the sad thoughts that have been haunting him since he first read the lyrics to their new song. 'Calm down.'

"Seungmin, it's time to go."

Quickly opening his eyes to look at his leader, he nods and stands up. This prompts the elder to put a hand on the younger's shoulder.

"Something bothering you?" Chan asks, earning a soft smile from Seungmin who was shaking his head. "You sure?"

"Yes hyung," he answers.

Glancing one last time at the younger male, Chan then dismisses the topic and walks away with Seungmin following behind.

The moment Seungmin stood on stage with the blinding lights pointing at him and his friends, Seungmin couldn't keep his thoughts at bay anymore — not especially when the start of the song played through his in-ears.

_**I remember the day we first met** _

_**The shy smiles and the spilling sunlight** _

_**I knew, just by looking into your eyes** _

_**That we are one, that we are one** _

_**You are me** _

It's been eleven years since he first met (L/N) (F/N) yet the memory of their first meeting and every memory after that were as clear to him like a crystal. 

He was eight when he first met her in his elementary school's library. He was interested in reading a particular book he has been wanting to read since he first saw the notice on the front desk but upon looking around, he couldn't find any copy of it. Albeit dismayed, he opted to pick another book to read, not wanting to waste his trip to the library. Though, after looking around, he noticed there were barely open seats left in the small room. The only seat he could find was on the same table as a sleeping girl. Deciding it wouldn't harm anyone, he decided to make his way there and sat down without waking the female up. 

However, upon taking a good look at her, he noticed the familiar book cover he has been looking for tucked underneath her elbow. Now this made Seungmin think. With the unknown female sleeping, he could try and get the copy of the book but it could also cause her to wake up. Too busy debating his options, he didn't notice the female stir in her sleep and eventually woke up. 

The female rubs her eyes softly as she tries to focus on the male across him. Upon realizing it was one of the males from her class, she smiles. 

"You're Seungmin right?" 

With a slight jolt, Seungmin hastily turns to her only to find her smiling brightly at him. 

"How do you know me?" He asks, confused and surprised. 

"We're from the same class," she grins, before bowing her head lightly. "I'm (L/N) (F/N)."

The name sparks something in Seungmin as he realizes who the female is. She was the silent girl at the back of the room. 

"Oh," he says sheepishly. "I'm Kim Seungmin, it's nice to meet you, (F/N)."

"Anyway, Seungmin, you're here to borrow this right?" 

She raises the book in between them, causing Seungmin to furrow his brows in question. 

"I heard you tell your friends at lunch," she explains softly. "But my friends were wanting to borrow it too. I knew the library only had two copies so I made sure to borrow one before they could so you can get to read it."

With wide eyes, Seungmin stares at her with genuine shock. "But why?" 

"You seemed so excited about it that your smile was really bright! The smiles I see were always forced so I wanted to see your bright smile again as a change."

"O-Oh," he was surprised and flattered. "Thank you then."

Giggling softly, she responds. 

"It's no problem Seungmin. Here you go!" She passes the book to him before picking her bag up. "I guess I got to—" 

"Stay." He demands. 

"Eh?" A noise of confusion escapes her lips. "Why?"

Seungmin didn't know why either but he brushed it off as wanting to get to know the quiet yet unusually kind-hearted female from his class. There was something about her that made him want to befriend her. 

"I want to be friends with you," he declares. "And I can't do that if you're not here to talk with me."

Just as her look of surprise morphed into a look of endearment, the sunlight cradled her face softly, making her appear more angelic than she already is. 

"Guess I gotta stay then. 

_**Whenever you smile, whenever you struggle** _

_**I’ll always protect you, for you** _

_**I can even jump across time to go to you** _

Upon seeing the smiles their fans had on their faces, Seungmin can't help but remember why he fell in love with singing more. 

And it was all because of a simple _"Thank you for singing, Seungmin."_

After their exchange in the library, they ended up spending more time together before and after school to the point their families knew each other. 

Sometimes, they would hang out together in public, with the supervision of a parent or guardian, or would go to each other's place. 

With (F/N)'s parents being often away on business matters, she was usually left in the care of the Kims. They didn't mind taking care of the child; after all, she made Seungmin happier and, like Seungmin, was sort of mature for their age. She would spend the nights she was in their care with Seungmin in his bedroom. They didn't let the difference in their gender hinder them from sleeping together in the same bed and would always end up with their limbs entangled with one another. Most nights, it was peaceful for the both of them.

But a night came when (F/N) suffered from a nightmare, an imaginary vision wherein she lost both her parents and Seungmin, and couldn't go back to sleep. Despite the blanket that hugged her small form, she was shaking badly and could barely breathe. This caused Seungmin to slowly wake up from his slumber and find the female having a panic attack from the thoughts that plagued her mind.

"(F/N)?" His tone was groggy and wavering. Sitting up, he rubbed his eyes and turned to his best friend who failed to notice him wake up. With the help of the night light, he was able to see the way her body shook with fear, causing him to quickly pull her into a tight hug.

On the inside, Seungmin was panicking too. He was only a kid, after all. Remembering how his mother used to calm him down, he slowly rocked her back and forth and tried to run his fingers through her hair, only for him to accidentally pull it which elicited a light groan from her.

"Sorry," he apologized, halting his actions before turning to look at her in the eyes. "How are you feeling?"

"I'm s-scared, S-Seungmin," she stammered, choking back a sob as she spoke.

Seungmin frowned at the thought of not being able to calm his best friend down until—

 _"In a small, white boat in the blue sky,"_ he starts, trying his best to sing softly and maintain the melody. _"Are a cinnamon tree and a rabbit."_

He slowly rubs her back in a gentle manner. 

_"Without sail and without oar, yet gliding — gliding smoothly to a western shore,"_ he continues, smiling inwardly when she stopped sobbing. _"Sailing across the Milky Way to the land of clouds. Where does it journey beyond the land of clouds?"_

Her sobs turned into sniffles as her trembling eased up. 

_"Towards the sparkling reflection so far away to the beacon light of a new dawn. Now, child, find a road."_

Almost immediately, he felt her relax in his arms as she slowly fell back to sleep with the help of his singing. Smiling, he places her back down beside him and covers her with their shared blanket.

"Sleep well." He whispers, sliding underneath the blanket as well. Before he could close his eyes and let sleep take over he then heard her speak in a small voice. 

"Thank you for singing, Seungmin."

_**I believe I believe** _

_**Even if the world changes, I won’t change** _

_**Will you promise me?** _

_**In this beautiful place** _

_**All of the memories of loving you** _

_**Will become a story that never ends and shine** _

Seungmin then remembered the year they finally entered middle school and adolescence. While they met new people and became part of different circles, they never dropped each other. Everyday after class, they would walk home together, sometimes stopping by to spend more time with one another. 

However, a day came when (F/N) failed to appear in their meeting spot outside the school gate. This immensely worried Seungmin, prompting him to go back to the campus in search of her. He didn't leave any area unchecked as worry started eating him at the disappearance of his best friend. Fortunately, as he started to exit the school again after giving up, he managed to overhear a pair of students talk about her. 

"I feel bad for (F/N)," one says with a deep frown. "She didn't deserve that treatment."

Now this earned Seungmin's interest.

"If he didn't like her he could have just rejected her!" The other exclaims. "He didn't have to splash her with cold water!" 

Reject? Splash? What happened to his best friend? 

"Excuse me," he cuts in, causing the two to whip their heads towards him. "I heard you were talking about (L/N) (F/N) — I'm her best friend and I've been looking for her."

"Oh! You must be Seungmin-ah! (F/N) talks so much about you," the first girl says with a smile before frowning again. "She went home early."

"There was this boy in class who everyone assumes to be her crush because she always stares at him," she continues. "Word got to him and before lunch time, he approached her."

"Yeah and he just told her that he will never like someone like her and then dumped water on her," continues the other. "Then she just brushed it off but I guess she was really hurt about it since she rushed home."

While Seungmin was disappointed that she never told him about her crush, he was more infuriated at the other male's actions. 

(F/N) was a sweet girl and she didn't deserve to be treated that way. 

"I gotta see her," he starts running off, only to halt in his tracks to turn towards the two. "Thank you by the way!" 

Now that he knew what was going on, he didn't waste time admiring the scenery — he had to get to her quickly. 

Luckily, it didn't take long before he arrived at her house's doorstep with the spare keys she gave him in his hands. He knew that her parents were away and she had no one to take care of her. 

Quietly, he puts his shoes on the shoe rack and places his bag on the couch. Closing the door, he then makes his way upstairs to where her room was. Even from the outside of her room, her sobs were loud enough to be heard. 

And it broke Seungmin's heart. 

As softly as he can, he calls her name while opening the door. He had to stop himself from running to her when he saw how broken she looked like. 

"I heard what happened," he tells her, sitting at the edge of her bed. "Why didn't you tell me?" 

"I didn't want to bother you," she answers. "I didn't want to be a burden and I didn't want to ruin your day either."

Now this alarmed Seungmin. He never heard her talk like this — not even when she ran away from home and went to his on a midnight after her parents wouldn't stop fighting. 

"You know that wouldn't happen," he tells her pointedly. "I really care about you to view you as a bother or a burden."

That was all it took before the female clung on to him, sobbing against his chest. 

"It was all a misunderstanding, Min," she sobs. "I never liked him, it was just a rumor and yet it still hurts when he did that!" 

"What did he do to you, sunshine?" He asks, wrapping his arms around her protectively. "Tell me."

"He told me how creepy I was for staring at him, he also told me that I was ugly and a pushover," her voice was starting to waver, causing Seungmin to hug her tighter. "Then he told me that if I stay like this no one would genuinely like me. When I told him I wasn't a pushover, he poured his water on me and challenged me to fight back."

With every word that poured out of her mouth, he couldn't help but feel the anger building up in him. 

"I didn't fight back, Min. My parents are already handling so much, they don't need to handle a child who got into a petty fight," he could feel her clutching the fabric of his shirt. "But it hurts to be degraded like that — to be humiliated. It hurts so much."

"Just let it out," he starts rocking their entangled forms together as he runs his hands through her hair. "I got you, sunshine. I'm here, you're not alone."

Until her sobs died down into mere hiccups, he continued to rock her back and forth while whispering soft nothings. Upon feeling her relax in his arms, he halts his ministrations and looks at her softly. 

"Are you feeling better?" He asks in a hushed voice, wiping her tears away. 

"I feel tired." 

"Then sleep, I'll be here when you wake up," he promises her. "I got you."

He then lies on his back, letting her rest on top of him as he continues to run his hand through her hair once again. 

"Can you sing for me, Min?" She requests, closing her eyes as she snuggles into him. 

"Of course," he answers, pulling the blanket on top of them. Without further stalling, he starts to sing softly. 

_**Never say goodbye, because you and I are one** _

_**Because we will walk in the same dream** _

_**Please just smile next to me like you are now** _

_**Farther than tomorrow, longer than forever** _

_**I love you** _

Seungmim could remember how protective he became over her after that day. While he still gave her adequate personal space, he made sure to check up on her during breaks and wait for her outside her classroom after class. He also made sure to report the male that made his sunshine cry to the teachers and get the consequence he deserved. 

While he definitely got threats from the male, he didn't mind any of it. After all, what matters was (F/N)'s well-being. As they grew closer each day, he then realized—

He was slowly developing romantic feelings for his best friend. And for him, he didn't hate the development. 

_**On nights I couldn’t sleep because of my worries** _

_**I used to look at you and promise to the sky** _

_**Even my dreams that are so far away** _

_**I promised I wouldn’t let go** _

A smile then appeared on Seungmin's lips as he remembered the day when the roles were reversed. He remembers being really stressed one particular night to the point he questioned everything he could think about. Luckily, she was there to help him stay on his feet. 

"Min?" She calls out as she enters his room, a travel bag in her hand. She places it down on the floor beside his bed before sitting down beside his sulking figure. "Scoot over."

"Why are you even here?" He questions, not bothering to look at her. "We have school tomorrow, (F/N). Go home."

That's when Seungmin realized how stubborn (L/N) (F/N) can really be. 

"Nope! You've been down in the dumps since this morning. I can't let you sleep with a heavy heart," she tells him, pushing him so she can lay down beside him. After seeing him roll-over to give her more space, she knew that he was welcoming her comfort. Smiling, she holds him from behind. "So what's wrong with my Minnie?" 

_My Minnie._

_**My Minnie.** _

A smile formed on his lips for the first time that day as he repeated those two words in his head. He only snapped out of his trance when she hugged him tighter and leaned her forehead against his shoulder. 

"It's nothing, I just feel really—" he tries to think of a word. "—pathetic."

"Want to elaborate on it?" 

He contemplates for a moment before shaking his head. 

"You sure?" He nods in response. 

"Do you want me to distract you from those thoughts?" Another nod. 

"Well, for starters," she says, trying to think of what to say. "I really admire you!" 

Seungmin's cheeks burned at the sudden confession and the male had to keep himself from getting too happy about it. 

'Calm down Seungmin,' He thinks. 'She only admires you in a friendly way.'

"You're really cool and collected," she explains. "You do really well in class and even when were not classmates, you help me a lot. You're really kind Minnie, do you know that?" 

"You've told me that a lot," he responds, his voice just bit above a whisper. This earns him a small hum from the female. "So yes."

"You're also really talented and skilled," she explains. "You're great at a lot of things — especially singing! I think by now my favorite thing to hear is you singing." 

"Really?" By now, Seungmin couldn't help the bright smile that was making its way to his face. "You're not lying?" 

"I'm not!" She defends. "You have a really soothing voice and hearing you sing makes me forget about my problems! I could listen to you sing forever and not grow tired of it—" 

"That's impossible. I can't sing forever, it's too tiring to sing forever," He cuts in, earning a light slap on the shoulder. "What? That's the truth!" 

"You know what I mean!" She whines, causing the male to chuckle. "I really hope you reach your dream of being a professional singer."

"Will you support me until then?" He asks, now turning around to look into her eyes. "Will you support me until I reach that dream?" 

"I'll support you even when you reach that dream," she answers, smiling up at him. 

"I'll support you until the end."

Everything was all right now and he knew it would be for a long time. 

_**Even if you get lost and get lonely for a moment** _

_**Listen to my small breath, my voice** _

_**If you call me, I’ll find you, wherever you are** _

_**I promised I wouldn’t cry, even in stormy days** _

_**I promised to hold you even more warmly** _

_**And protect you** _

Or so he thought. 

"Seungmin?" Her broken voice blared through the speaker of his phone the moment he picked her call up. "Are you busy?" 

He's currently waiting for his turn for the open auditions and had to focus but he couldn't bring himself to say yes. 

"No I'm not," he lies. "Why?" 

"Can you sing for me?" Her voice was cracking further. "Please Seungmin, I'm scared."

He wanted nothing more than to go to her and hold her tightly as he sang but he knew he couldn't do that. Instead, he gripped his phone tightly and started to sing. 

He didn't mind the curious glances he got from the people in the vicinity. He only focused on singing to the terrified girl. 

"Thank you, Seungmin," he then hears the moment he finishes the song. "And I'm sorry" 

Before he could ask, the line went dead. 

_**The love you gave me remains** _

_**That’s how I have the strength to live** _

_**You don’t cry** _

_**Let’s save the goodbyes for the next time we meet** _

_**Never cry** _

Never did Seungmin imagine that a day would come when he would come home and hear the words 

**"(F/N) is dead."**

He had to look at his parents repeatedly and ask if they were joking several times before his composure broke. 

"She was on her way to her parents' office when she got into a car crash," his mom starts to explain. "She was in a critical condition and didn't survive."

"No—" he shakes his head as the tears started to flow like a river against his cheeks. "That's impossible. I was just in a call with her earlier and—" 

'The line went dead,' He realizes. 'That's why she was terrified.'

"I'm sorry sweetheart," his mom apologizes, pulling him into a hug. She knew how important the girl was to her son and she also knew how much this will affect him. "I'm so sorry."

That night, as Seungmin clutched the puppy plushie she gave her on his 10th birthday, he sobbed until he fell asleep. And when the next morning arrived, Seungmin still didn't smile. 

But how could he?

After all, they took his sunshine away from him. 

_**The story we made remains like this** _

_**It’ll make our endless days so beautiful** _

_**I want to live with bright dreams, always** _

_**Forever in you** _

He then remembers the letter Seungmin received the week following her death. 

' _Dear Seungmin,_

_If this letter reaches you, it must mean something bad happened to me and no longer by your side.'_

"Bad is an understatement," he mutters. 

_'So first of all, I'm really sorry for leaving you. It must've really hurt a lot so remember to let everything out, okay Min? I would tell you not to cry but I don't want you to hurt yourself by keeping your feelings in. I can't hug you while I'm gone, you know?'_

_**Never say goodbye, because you and I are one** _

_**Because we will walk in the same dream** _

_**Please just smile next to me like you are now** _

_**Farther than tomorrow, longer than forever** _

_**I love you** _

_'But Min, I want you to know that you shouldn't let my disappearance hold you back. There's more to life than me, you know?'_

"But none of them can be as great or greater than you," he mumbles. "You're special." 

_'So you better get back on track soon and continue to thrive forward to reach your dreams. Don't be afraid to befriend new people either. Get a girlfriend while you're at it!'_

"I don't think I can like anyone else who isn't you."

_**The words I love you might be a bit typical** _

_**But I can’t save those words** _

_**Because I love you more than anything in the world** _

_'Speaking of girlfriend, did I ever tell you how much I love you? I love you more than a friend, Seungmin. There was never a day that I didn't try to get enough courage to confess. Your eyes, your smile, your laugh, your voice, your personality, your singing — everything. I love everything about you, Min, and I'm sad that I didn't get to tell you while I was still beside you. I hope that in a different life, we can be together until the end._

_Please take care of yourself, Min. Always remember to prioritize your well-being over everything else._

_I love you, Kim Seungmin. I wish the best for you. Seungminnie fighting!!'_

"I love you too, (F/N)," Seungmin says, hugging the letter close to her. "And you're the only one I'll love."

_**I’m waiting for a tomorrow** _

_**That I will live for you** _

_**All day, making a story that won’t ever end** _

_**The ending is like the title** _

From then on, Seungmin did what she asked him to. While he spent most nights wishing to see her again, he still managed to move forward. He managed to get into the company and become a trainee, it didn't long either before he debuted. Life was tough as a trainee and as a student, moreso because of the survival show that constantly put them on the risk of being eliminated, and because of the longingness he felt since her death. 

But he did it. 

Kim Seungmin did it. 

He managed to debut with nine other people as a group many fans came to love — he became a member of Stray Kids. He found his second family and met a lot of people who inspired him and who he inspires. 

And it made him happy.

"Are you proud of me, (F/N)?" He thinks, looking at the fans that were cheering and supporting for them. "I made it."

_**Please just smile next to me like you are now** _

_**Farther than tomorrow, longer than forever** _

_**My love** _

As the song came to an end, he sang his last lines with every bit of emotion he was feeling at that moment. All the pain, the longing, the accomplishment, the love — he poured everything into his singing. 

He wanted to make himself proud.

He wanted to make his family proud of him

He wanted to make his company proud of him. 

He wanted to make Stray Kids and Stay proud of him. 

But most importantly, 

He wanted (L/N) (F/N) to be proud of him. 

_**Never say goodbye, because you and I are one** _

_**Because we will walk in the same dream** _

_**Please just smile next to me like you are now** _

_**Farther than tomorrow, longer than forever** _

_**I love you** _

Seungmin had to stop himself from shedding tears as the song came to an end. Softly, he puts a smile to show his fans and the camera. He didn't want anyone to worry about his trip down memory lane. The moment they were backstage again, he quickly sat down and leaned back the wall like he did earlier. This time, his eyes were opened as he stared against the room's white ceiling. 

Unfortunately for him, his manager came in and called for his attention. 

"Someone requested to see you, are you up to seeing them?" 

Seungmin was confused and conflicted but he felt like talking with someone would distract him momentarily from the pain. So with a nod, he stands up softly just as his manager called the visitor in. 

However, to his surprise—

"(F/N)..." he whispers softly in disbelief. "You're— you're alive? You're here?" 

The female — the same female who caught his attention all those years ago, the same female that stole his heart since they were teens, and the same female that he longed to be with once again — only smiles softly before stretching her arms out. 

"I'm back, Min," she tells him, tears slowly cascading down her cheeks. "I missed you."

Seungmin ignored the questioning looks from his friends and manager. All that mattered now was the female that stood in front of him. 

While she was still shorter than him, she grew up a lot. She matured a lot but she was still the same beautiful and soft-hearted female he cared for. 

She was still his (F/N) — **his** sunshine. 

Letting go of his composure, he runs over to her and pulls her into an embrace. Though, it lasted short as he pulled away to take a good look at her face. 

"You're back—" his voice started to crack as he pulled her into another hug"—You're really back."

"Yes, Seungmin. I'm back," she hugs back just as tight. 

"And I'm here to stay."


	2. Epilogue: Together Again

After some discussion with his manager and his friends, he was given permission to stay with (F/N) for the night. Now clad in comfortable sleepwear as they laid on the bed, limbs entangled together as they soaked in each other's presence amidst the silence, Seungmin could only smile. 

She was finally here with him again. She was finally back in his arms. 

_His sunshine was back._

"I really thought you were gone forever," he admits, pain evident in his voice. "I was really devastated."

"I'm so sorry you had to go through that, Min," she apologizes, resting a palm against his cheek as she caressed it softly. "I really am." 

"What happened anyway?" He asks, hugging her tighter. "Why did they tell me you were dead?" 

"I was in a really critical condition and barely survived. I was comatosed for a month and could have died anytime. They didn't want you to get even more hurt by hoping so they just told you the worst possible thing that could happen," she starts with a sigh. "I always had a fear of traveling since I always had to travel a lot to be with my parents and the accident turned that small fear into a trauma." 

"I had nightmares everything night since I woke up. I was terrified of traveling and had to be homeschooled. I also had to undergo therapy so I can get better somehow. That's why I couldn't contact you the moment I woke up. I was too scared, Min. Until now, I'm still scared but I got to slowly move forward. That's why I decided to look for you today."

"And why is that? Why me?" He knew the answer but he wanted to hear it frlm her. 

"Because you're my safe space, Min," she tells him. "You make me feel safe and protected."

"I got you," those words naturally came out of his mouth. "I got you sunshine. I won't let you go ever again."

He then leans his forehead against her as he looks into her star-filled eyes that he missed a lot. 

"I know that I'm an idol and it'll be hard for us but I promise you that I'll always be here for you," he leans in. "I'll always make time for you. I'll always protect you."

"And I'll always be here to support you," she says, her gaze soft and warm. "I love you."

As their lips slowly met, Seungmin then whispers against her lips. 

"I love you too."

And finally, the pair shared a long overdue kiss. 


End file.
